sooner or later

em.lately aku sudah hilang connection dgn real world.last week i sleep almost 74 hours.OD taking sleep pills.yeah.u can blame me.its not like im gonna suicide or what.i just overtake.i take 3 in 2 hours sbb pills tu tak working pon.so what?

em n then this week kinda busy.attend saniy's sister engagement, having futsal matchups, meeting blood brothers.karoke.shisha.eventho im still not over it.and still grounded for the things ive done, it didnt help at all.betul kata tya aziz.its so hard living like this.feels like every breath u take mcm satu big step yg sangat besar which ntah siapa tau we'll make it or not without any care.

em.to those bloodbrothers thanks for being there when im in need.to lanc inc clan thanks also sbb spend time with me.its a small favor i can do for u guys by managing and handling the clan issue.

im done talking with her.seems all my words pun takde guna.summore im just another big jerk in front of her eyes.yeah my future is gloomy like what my heart is now.im learning to swallow each and every second of it.whats the point of tomorrow if now u didnt do anything to make sure tomorrow exist right? some people just dont understand it.well some people do.

time passes by.people come and go.deaths and birth.its all karma.if she thinks only she suffers from it, she shud know i suffers more then her.yelah.im just a shadow.phantom guy.a little sacrifice for me pon cant.em i shudnt talk bad about cha.in fact i am not for ya.i a jerk.bad man.all i just know is having a partner just like u said.

if its the end.so be it.july is comming its gonna be a new book.im moving far away.far far away for sure this time.to those yg i remember when im moved away consider urself is a very good friend of mine.to those whos i fogotten and forsaken,i am very sorry.i cudnt bear to watch myself touchering and make u suffer with the presence of myself there.maybe im gone and things wud get better.there no heart feeling.i realized how unneeded myself in ur life.im just another pain.

so.go away mr sadness.go away very far.im no longer in ur territory.to LORD i pray,gimme strength to face this cruel world.

i never walked so far on a lonely street with no one with me.its it worth the pain with no one to blame? for all of my insecurities.

how did i ever let you go..

p/s : one day...one room..

1 comments:

Marker Hitam said...

hey chill okayh.
i'll be there if you need someone to talk with, aite?