raya, again

i've seen a lot of post about raya. mostly about raya tak best, raya boring, raya this, raya that. makes me smile when i try to recall about whats raya means to me.

i am just like u, going to the same phase/process of life. i find raya is boring when i was at ur age. and here i am, today, raya is one of the things that i look forward to. besides a short brief of holiday, every raya does mean something to me, as u grow up older another year, leaving it all behind.

when i was just about ur age, raya doesnt seems important to me. apatah lagi puasa. just like any other normal days to me. cuma tak makan bila time puasa, raya tu jumpa family members salam2 pastu dah. tido. ada rezeki dapatlah duit raya. lepas tu nak cepat2 balik uni. raya bosan.

tapi after few years, puasa/raya does have its personal meanings to me. as i grow up, i have very little time to spend with my family. and one by one, my friends are getting married and have their own family. people who i love the most, people who i spend my entire life growing up with, people who i consider the closest after my own siblings, people who were there when i need them the most and vice versa. perhaps u guys had this kind of relationship with ur friends. to me, this bond, will last forever. and as i grow up, i didnt even had any chance to meet em, have drinks together, share stories, catching up and stuffs. i barely had time for all of these. apatah lagi punya masa nak balik ke kampung jenguk mak abah dgn kawan2.

i miss them. i do, really. i wish that i am young again. i wish that i could hangout with my mates again, like the old times. but honestly, right now, with the current busy lifestyle and sorts - i cant. they all have their own lives to live and the only chance that i have to meet them - raya. i believe they felt the same as i did. besides, i get to enjoy raya as an adult. instead of student/kids. so i can learn how to mix and mingle with other adults, perhaps get to know my family members even further.

kinda sad tgk generasi zaman ni. raya ke tak raya ke sama je bagi diorang. smart phones, tablets, internet. totally a different meaning terhadap raya to them. they no longer want to talk to the elders, apatah lagi tegur sesama cousin etc. ngadap fon, suruh buat itu tak tau, ini tak tau, berapa sangat la yg tahu. rumah makcik2 lagi la entah zaman bila last melawat tak tau. see? how can u say raya ni not happy? kalau ada internal family conflict tu aku tak dapat la nak cakap apa, but try to find a way to settle.

my aunt and her son passed away late may, and her death somehow affected whole family. another member gone. i was close to her, but bila dah adult ni aku pun jarang balik, sedih rasa sbb tak dapat jumpa dah. and i hope u people do cherish ur family and try to spend time together when u have the chance to do so.

so semua ni based on my personal experience lah, as a family-bond-oriented kind of person. my raya was awesome, but i take it for granted. and i hope walau tak best mana pun raya anda, please at least try to find the happiness during this festive season?

so, hows your raya last year? care to share?

p/s : please be safe during this festive season as people travel back to their hometown, busy on the road and everything, take care of urself aight? penat rehat, tido. tukar driver, jgn laju2, biar lambat asal selamat. and kalau nak jimat, carpool lah balik kampung :D selamat hari raya, maaf zahir batin