things that i kinda miss a lot

its bulan puasa again. pejam celik, pejam celik, dah puasa. and dah bulan 6. wow so fast. the last time i keep track of time is waktu CNY. pegi pd. cam laju gila. eh, alih2 dah puasa.

i kinda miss a lot of things bila tiba bab puasa ni. family jgn cerita lah. i lost track dah berapa lama tak balik rumah makan sahur dgn buka dgn family. and now they are all in dhaka, it seems impossible to gather everyone as a family, sit and makan sama-sama. last time dapat duduk sekali makan is zaman belajar, eventho tak berapa nak bercakap dgn family, tapi boleh rasa semangat family tu.

currently adik stay sekali, tapi dia pun cam endah tak endah je, keluar buka puasa dgn gf dgn kawan2. tinggalkan aku sendiri makan kat rumah sorang2. akak kat johor, probably living her own life, adik sorang lagi pun kat johor, maybe buka dgn tunang dia or kawan2 dia.

i have friends. a lot of them. sure mmg la boleh buka sekali takde masalah tapi point dia kat sini is family. anyday pun boleh pegi makan dgn kawan2. tak ada masalah. i mean, lama sangat dah rasanya tak jumpa family sendiri, makan lauk mak masak n rasa puasa sesama kat rumah.

kadang2 jeles tengok kawan2 opis balik awal, nak buka dgn anak dgn family masing2. tinggal la aku sorang2 kat opis terpinga2 cari kawan nak buka dgn sapa. ada rezeki, makan dgn hosmet, kalau tak, pegilah kedai abe tu makan sorang2 terpinga2. takde sapa tanya makan apa, dgn sapa, kat mana. yep faham, benda2 gini trivial je bagi some people. but bagi orang yg sebatang kara, yg almost 10 tahun jauh dari family, benda2 gini agak terasa bila tiba time dia.

masih ingat zaman kanak2 dulu. time puasa dulu selalu dekat hujung2 tahun so cuti skolah. jadi semua pon balik kampung. berbuka dgn cousin semua. malam2 p tarawih pastu main mercun. ah good old times. i wish that i could go back to that time.

growing up sucks. being an adult with responsibilities, sucks big time.