look. there is no other way to tell u this.
look at u. why do keep on destroying things that u created. why did u become like this, i know u'll read this. but currently ur destroying ur own life. ur something that i dont remember. ur my friend. in fact, among the best of the best, u cant keep going on like this man, u cant simple hate this and that. u just cant. u cant just go and tell the whole world u dont like em. u have to learn and earn respect. we are not kids nemore. we arent what we used to be back there. stop kicking people outta ur life. stop being so childish, if u care about people, that is not the way to deal with it. even after u've done dealing with those things, u did ur part, there is no need for u to drag urself to their level, what matters the most now is u, not them, everybody needs a saving but for now, try to save ur own ass. dont be so sure about things that didnt yet happen, u can simply plan, but cant that plan cant be simply execute ur way, we wont always get what we want, but we do always get what we need. lowered that ego man, control urself, this is not the time to apply "i dont care i dont know i am on my own" u definitely need somebody, u definitely need some help. look at u, count, in ur life currently, where ur right now, how many people that u can rely on. if u keep on doing that to those people, whos gonna help u in the end? learn to live in a community, socially. ur way smarter than me, u can pull this one easily, and next, do not forget god. always. im writing this because i care. we care. people care. i cant let u go on rampaging and destroying ur ownself. i am concern dude. i cant always look back and see how do u progress, and how do i help u if u dont want to help urself? grow up a bit, be matured, be somebody who are u supposed to be. this is not regarding what happen to u alone, this is what happen to us, to our circle, to our hometown people, to people who been living with us, to people who've known us for ages. this is for ur own good, our good. yes i do admit i am not a perfect person myself, i fucked up a few times, until now, fuck-up happens, they do happens and that is not a reason why u shud go on keep on punishing people and urself. give this lecture a thought, and when ur ready to talk, lets walk. i'll be there, waiting for u.
dont do something stupid, dont go down with the ones who are already fallen, save urself.
walk.
ice-man
this reminds me of something. 10 years ago. i really need a person to talk now. i dont need any facebook chats, or any twitter DM's. i want a real communication. somebody who is on equal level, i dont need kiddies or whatever.
i just want to talk, and maybe had a few advice. im having the same thing which im having 10 years ago.
june rants
its been 4 years. since the date 20 june 2009. tak banyak nak cakap, i am living well. eat well, play well. and so does everything else. glad i survived this date without much struggle, at first, yes, hell on earth, tercari-cari apa nak buat, dengan sapa, how i woulda survive without whom i knew for so long, the one i talk with, the one i share with. but somehow, i manage to pull this on my own. surviving, and striving.
ok enough about that. i once talk with "ehem" in a serious conversations regarding, dont u want somebody in ur life?
jujur, saya cepat bosan. ini bukan mereka yang cuba ataupun saya yang cuba dekati, paling lama pun seminggu, i had it all figure out. i know what she likes, i know what she wants to wear, i know her background, i know almost everything about her just in a week. tapi tak semua. 1st impression, as the process going deeper and deeper, and eventually have chance of meeting, during twtups or random lepaking session, usually my impression is amazingly accurate. tapi saya totally lansung tak salahkan the other party.
its all about me. either im losing all of my skills, or girls are just like that (stereotyping) and its just me, who've done it all in the previous relationship. during that 10 years of friendship (including 4 years being together) we have been texting since form 3, can u believe that? and do almost everything. were kinda having a hybrid of long distance and close-distance relationship. im out of games to play just keep the love on and on. i've run out of idea what to do next, and when im going to use it in the coming relationship, i already knew, i already knew what will happen. yes there is always things which i didnt do yet, but i dont know, i've done everything with this damn brain, and to hope the other party to do the same, its hard.
sekejap je rasa teruja tu. nak tau nama, nak tau itu ini, bila dah tau. alahai makin lama makin hambar, and then bila tak tahu, mulalah nak give up. im stuck like this. ni la padahnya bila kau dah terlalu lama bercinta, dah buat segala apa, in the end tak jadi, and u'll become dumb in the next big thing. part "get to know her" je best, bila part "getting her" dah jadi tak best. tak tau kenapa,
ah ntah hape aku membebel. twitter down, maintenance maybe. to those few people who seems terasa dgn perbuatan aku ni, i apologize, i am sorry tho, in the process, u guys kena friendzone. u guys shud be my buddy, not somebody in the friendzone circles. too bad, i am picky about having buddies, friends, who cud make a difference. who is there, always, supporting u no matter what.
i need help. maybe u could help me. unlock the inner me.
good night.
i shud get some sleep.
review : Resident Evil : Operation Raccoon City
at first, as a resident evil fan, both games n movies, i have to say that up till now, it never gets me bored. i started to play the 1st title as early as 11, and up till now the latest series, operation raccoon city in this age of 25.
i have to say, the fear slowly fades away, leaving excitement and action packed game play. there no surprises to me anymore, i dont get a heart attack from B.O.W.S jumping out from a window, or hearing footsteps on the upper floor, or even get panic when im running out of ammunitions. from someone who plays this game slowly, enjoying every steps every bullets fired and keep on counting the 1st aid and herbs to heal, i turn into someone who play this game want it more and more, just like left 4 dead, never ending horde of mutated human, wars, fights, actions.
resident evil : operation raccoon city delivers a gameplay resembles Lost Planet 2, u can play it either LAN, or online, a co-op 3rd person shooter. or u can always goes solo in a offline campaign story mode. comes with 4 difficulties and will unlock Heroes Mode when u have finish the original campaign.
overall the game is just OK. i hate the camera angle part and character controlling part. the camera angle is just...ugly. u are fixed to only one angle, and with the char movement, its hard to play the game as u can no longer walk freely, or even jump like the rest of the resident evil series, more over, the crosshair sucks, even ur using the most sensitive gamepad or mouse. double crosshair, one in a large circle, in that large circle, there is smaller circle which indicates ur radius of bullets when fired, as for in ricochet effects of using semi-auto rifle.
the chars is okay, comes with upgradable weapons, skins and abilities. char customization before each round starts gives us advantage with the mission scenario given, up to this day i manage to play into mission 4 and there is another 3 mission waiting.
personally, i give this game 2.5 stars out of 5 stars. fix the controlling and camera issue. that shud be it.
some time ago
she/he left u, now what?
there is a lot of things which can be done when she/he left u. either way u left her/him.
As strong as men say they are, they are usually children when it comes to break ups. Unless they make the decision to leave their partner, they often feel extremely disillusioned. This is the nature of men. Starting at a young age, men are told that they must be the provider, they must make the decisions and they must be in control. It's a system that society set up a long time ago and that we still accept today.
So when a woman tells a man that it's over, she's not only ending their relationship, but subconsciously challenging his position in society by taking control and making a decision. Each one of us knows at least one man who has always been logical, calm and collected. That is, until his partner ends the relationship. All of a sudden, he's falling apart; he cries, neglects his work, stops eating... he might even start harassing or stalking his ex.
And This happens to almost each and everyone of us. Mens. And this is why i am here, maybe these idea would help.
1. Date someone who is significantly less attractive.
2. Have a breakup party.
3. De-facebook, Un-follow them both in facebook or twitter.
4. Go back to your friends.
5. Play some video games.
6. Play some sports.
7. Watch some movies/dramas.
8. Update resume
9. Format computers.
10. Start a new saving account, bet on how much you can save without her.
11. Have a library card.
12. Join gym
13. Go for a walk
14. Answer some surveys online.
15. Buy some new clothes.
16. Buy a sport bike.
17. Go for a holiday.
18. Learn foreign language.
19. Fall in love with k-pop idols.
20. Cook
21. Paint your room, change the layout of furniture
22. Do some charity works
23. Pray
24. Get a pet.
25. Go karaoke
26. Thai massage.
27. Remain focus
28.Go crazy. Literally so something crazy, bungee jumping etc.
29. Read a book.
30. Reunite with old friends and families.
31. Become Manchester City fans.
32. Start a troll account.
33. Go hiking.
34. Play some dota.
35. Go ride
36. Get rid of the cellphones, keep the landlines.
37. Buy DVDs
38. Dont rush into the next relationship.
39. Forgive your ex.
40. Be grateful and happy.
hilang, kehilangan, whatever u call it
last few weeks aku pulang ke kampung di batu pahat, and sempat berjumpa brothers and melepak apa semua. everything was normal, but not that long. a friend of mine, in fact, a very good friend of mine, who can i consider a brother, and equal to me, didnt make it thru on his love life, which i can say reaching the happy ending.
it takes me a while to hear his story, and i aint judging, because i know this is hard, hard for me, hard for him, hard for the other party, hard for everybody. and it does took a while to make him feel ok. i've been thru that moment, but luckily i had Luna K to talk sense into me. and i finally snapped out from my misery, and become ohsem like i am now. LEULZYAH
so the thing is, this is not the 1st thing happens to my circle of brothers, its already 3 times. and what i am having in my mind, is, the same thoughts that i've been thinking since i've admit defeat in my own love life.
so i just wanna share, love isnt easy, love isnt nice, love isnt all that mostly u people have in mind, love isnt all about keluar berdating, suka-suka, berciom-sana sini, jalan sana sini, but i love to say, itu semua yes, during awal2 kenal, 1-2 years bersama, zaman belajar, zaman kemaruk, when it gets serious, its not that.
lebih2 lagi bila any parties declare a cancellation at the very last minute, the damage done, omg its ugly. is too ugly for both parties, it might have an impact that would be life changing moments, where when ur not strong enough to live thru it, or having a bad circles of people, or bad environment around u, there is the point where u'll fall deep enough, in to the abyss, incapable of saving urself, incapable of using ur brain to think, to decide and obviously to do anything.
that is why i keep trollin those fuckin iluvislam people, islamic, yet horny and desperate, or even terfaktab or whatever blog u all read and share the quotes from, unless ur having a happy family of 5, yes i do approve ur quotes and personal experience. ur just fucking 16 and share love quotes over here n there, not to mention quoted from tumblr, or whatever source it came from. its just, yuck, i do want to vomit from my ass.
and zehar derus shit and so? mind you, fuck off. lame ass punya quotes. but nonetheless, its all about jodoh dan rezeki, which is beyond our control. so to me, this love topic is quite subjective. i've seen the best of if, and i've seen the worst of it, but when it comes to kiddies, yg beriya2 love quotes, and half-cook kiddies yg islamik or whatever hipster u are, ur love quotes, advice, and shits is nothing compared to my personal experiences.
me? i came out from and unstable family, i do admit, my parents have been going thru hard times, and almost, almost went over, but eventually the problem ceased, and gladly, things are back to normal, they way it used to be. and i've been in one love, which i give everything, and end up losing a part of me, and i dont feel the same anymore.
but dont take my stories here as an example for u to set, i am not saying every relationship ends like this, just a few, in fact, this is only my point of view, and me sharing my thoughts. love, karma, good dees, this is all works in a mysterious way, we would never knew with who we end up, with who god want us to end up.
dont make this a reason why ur scared to fall in love again just because ur heart has been hurt deeply, and haunted by the past.
me? i do like a few people for now, but i am not gonna make any moves towards them. i still need to do a few things, and keep my promise to a few somebody. and till then, who know. i might have yum JR coming. LEULZYAH
so, this is my 2 cents, bye!
EURO 2012
reality, from a matured women view
"yum, awak bukanlah seorang yang boring, awak sedang menikmati hidup, awak bekerja, awak juga enjoy berkerja walaupun kadang-kadang awak sering complain, tapi itu adalah awak, awak kini dah jadi sebahagian daripada system yang manusia cipta."
"awak sekarang tidak punyai komitment terhadap benda lain selain daripada kerja awak, dan awak juga pada masa ini mungkin perlukan ataupun tidak perlukan seorang teman peribadi, tapi kadang kala perasaan itu ada, bila awak berada dalam keadaan paling lemah, awak pasti memerlukan seseorang untuk awak berehat, dan meluahkan sesuatu"
"kakak tgk awak masih awak, awak masih ada masa nak main game, lepak dengan kawan2, hidup awak carefree. kakak dah takda masa untuk tu semua, kakak ada tanggungjawab lain, provide tuk suami, anak akak, komitment kerja dan lain2, nanti sampai satu tahap, awak pun akan rasa ini semua, nasihat kakak, enjoy life kamu sementara kamu masih boleh, sebab nanti bila awak dah masuk ke stage seterusnya, awak takkan berpeluang buat apa yg awak buat skarang ni"
kak sal,
08/06/2012 - 8.10 malam
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