things that i miss along sept-october

billy talents ada album baru called afraid of heights.
i miss you, like iklim khatulistiwa, sejuk dan panas sepanjang tahun (pun intended)

hi, saja je atas tu. nak bagi tahu dunia yang band paling power yes billy talent ada album baru haha. and yeah gonna cerita abit. cliche tapi this happened depan mata. yang mana dapat tangkap moral values tu dapat la, yg mana tak tu wait till kena la eh.

benda paling basic dalam percintaan adalah :

1. trust
2. respect

tanpa dua ni, no point ada relationship dgn sesiapa. not even FWB, or gunting dalam lipatan. at some point, nak taknak kena respek dan percayakan the other party just to get something from them. but, kita taknak discuss pun pasal benda ni.

so the word for today is, space. literally, ruang. time, distance, whatever yang merujuk kepada space. and dalam relationship, space bg aku la, penting. lelagi bagi yg belom ada apa2 ikatan yang sah. and today, im gonna talk about space dan ertinya dalam kehidupan seharian seorang lelaki.

space. kenapa lelaki kena ada space, tak kira la yg dah ada pasangan ke yg dah takde pasangan. me, i kinda like my own personal n private space. dari kawan2 ke, dari gf ke family ke. satu ruang untuk aku rehat, asingkan suara-suara tak penting, tempat untuk aku balik rehat, dan avoid orang serta tempat untuk aku regain balik strength lepas seharian. and aku pun perlukan space dari gf aku so aku boleh keep a distance where i can watch myself over her, and watch her over myself. bukan nak menjauhkan diri nope. tapi cmon, belum kawin kot, baru level gf, so whatever aku buat, biarlah. and kalau hari-hari menghadap balik rumah apa benda balik nak melayan semua (kalau dah kawin, its another story, sebab itu dah jadi hukum - I OWN YOU, YOU OWN ME)

and yes space for us guys to berkawan dgn perempuan lain. why? so senang kita nak self-check how relevant are we, keep our perspective dari sudut lain, tempat nak luah or minta nasihat besides that one goddamn chick you tied to everyday. kesianlah tengok lelaki yg kena hantar dan pegi amik gf dia dari kerja. kena control. nak update status page social media pun kena maki, kena trigger curang n shit. cmon, dia dah depan mata kau, hantar kau pergi balik keje tiap malam susah senang dgn kau, and once he tweet about crush, kau nak marah2 pulak kenapa la? tak boleh? tak boleh dia tegur pempuan lain? here comes the 2nd element dalam relationship. RESPECT. bila kau respek, automatik datang trust. tapi kat sini aku nak cakap, aku tak tahu camne korang ukur trust/respect/honesty, but always, always keep some for yourselves.

and sure, benda ni goes both way, if guys can do it, so does girls. masing2 kena tahu boundary masing2. how far can you go, what to avoid and stuffs. love can sometimes be tiring, and it fades away in time. but, its up to you people to light up back the love between you guys. give and take. guys, belajar untuk tone down and give in, but not at the expense of your own freedom. and toleratelah dgn perangai perempuan.and girls, be inconsiderate. he might or might no say beautiful words, might and might not give you the world, but if heres there, during ups and down, put up with your shits, stay with him, support him takat mana mampu.

kesianlah tengok orang lelaki ni bila dia dah dapat gf yg dia nak, terus auto pilot jadi bodoh pak turut. pastu kena control dgn awek dia. ini tidak sihat, ini tidak boleh!


updating, as per requested

sup. hi. i am somehow still alive. haha. mcm biasa some days were hard some days were not. nothing much can be used to indicate my progress in life but, i manage to get the life that i wanted for now. a normal office hour time. i was bench to the office. now im doing finance, and sometimes properties. 9-6 routine which at first, a bit awkward to me.

i manage to experience office time. lunch break is freakin goddamn 1 hour. haha, selalu rehat unlimited, and boleh memilih makanan. and yup. theres time where i can go solat in the surau, so can extend the rehat time to 20 mins and another 20 during asar. getting used to it day by day. and i kinda miss working during the weekend. but hey, who am i to complain. been wanting this since like ages ago.

i was replaced with 2 young officers, who will rotate among themselves for the time being, for events and such. but something tells me that they wont last long, god pls no -___-

anyway. epi is now married. making me truly, the last guy on JG whos got...nothing. i build nothing, i have nothing. i havent done anything. i do not progress, i am stuck here, like this, wondering where and what should i do.

if u ask me what do i feel right now, i would say im lost. i could use a friend. with dots being 20k km away from me half across the world, i am a bit lonely for a guy. all im doing is just my routine to keep myself in check. work, go home, sleep, on repeat. us, didnt really talk at all. the time difference is just seems making things hard everyday. i sometimes slept at 3 or 4 tryna say good morning and greet her day properly and sometimes its so hard to get up early in the morning with me sleeping around 5 or 6.

and its the same for her. and i want to complain we are less having communication like we should and we missed a few things too. not much can be done now, and for now, im focusing on toning down a bit, have a little patience in me, trying and not to get mad while managing my anger and to channel it properly. to throw away this ego twice as majestic as everest? sigh.

mom's birthday is coming right up in 13 days. been planning to take the fam out for dinner later. seleb sekali dgn lil bruh's. satu kali jalan.

i think this is it for now. and below are the pictures of whatever happened between sep-oct

nostalgic batu pahat. its just classic here a the bustop

epi amd wife, naim and wife, daus and wife. me and muhself

we got paktam in the house meao!