workstation baru aku lol..

nah.workstation baru aku.baru susun.baru kemas.semperna dgn mode super la dia machine aku yg berkuasa ati radeon 2400 hdxt,1.2 TB storage,2 gb ram.quad-core 2.75.di sini la jugak di mana idea/proses study di lakukan.akakaka

pas penat kemas layan dota.haha bantai budak XD.bukan senang nak tgk^ in action LOL.nah skarang ngadap.see how i farm.BOT + double orbs n void.

correcting things.

lepas keluar dari satu hell hole aku terjatuh lagi dalam satu hell hole.again and again.dulu study.selesai masalah study,masalah hati.then now dua-dua skali.urgh.aku stress gile2.need diazepam in a lot of quantity please.i shud take 4 instead of 2.biar melayang.

sungguh fucked up situasi kehidupan aku skarang.sangat-sangat fucked up.tadi pagi mid term.very nais.aku dapat kertas.then end up tulis nama.there goes 20% aku for programming.very damn nice.then for maths its 2.5/15.wouldnt that make my day? yeah very nice thank you.its not like i cant do.i just..blur..too many things dlm kepala otak aku.rasa nak burst out..tapi tak burst out..
hilang semua bende dlm otak..terbodoh aku kat situ sejam stgh.then balik blur.baring tapi cant i text luna.dia pon kosong jugak katanye.haih..

em.starting soon im gonna start to correct things..i dont know if i cant,but i'll definitely try.
tak cuba then tak tau.

so here goes the list :

1)im quitting dota.yes.u heard me.qayyumx/pokerface is gonna quit for real this year - sorry last thing i'll do is try to organize the event and do the t-shirt for u guys.
2)focus more in study since next year is the killer year.
3)involved more in clubs and society,especially astena.
4)fix up my miserable life by trying to enjoy life.if u know by what i mean enjoying.
5)try to less online.its irresistable but i'll try.people tends like to talk with me on IM's.i dont know why.
6)try to live in organized time tables for myself.
7)do sports.gym and jogging.please do not stop qayyum.not now.ur far from stopping.
8)back to the ONE.
9)forget everything.eventho its not worth the pain.
10)redha.tawaduk.cekal dgn what happen.thats what my mom says..
11)kemaskan diri..aku sungguh miserable..

right..i'll try this..lets see if its correct me in a way...better from the fucked up life turns me into a monster,or sell my soul to the devil,this is my last last wall of last walls of ego.the last piece of myself.last piece of my mind which actually thinks.

gutten nicht.ja~ne

Pocketful of dreams.

Oh, reach,
Into a pocketful of dreams,
Oh, now,
before they fall out of the seams
Oh, take a chance
Don't matter if you fail,
you're too scared to try 'cause you might break a nail.

1st training.

this week dah start theater training.raya ni the play.

its about latar belakang semua di perbuat from old newspaper.

its mainly about several newspapers,then cerita di dalam newspapers2 tersebut,social,politics, and isu2 semasa.

i didnt have my char yet.but im one of the protesters for sure ;p

td we start dgn high key and low key notes.suara dari tummy.lama tak voice it sucks.sesuai karoke je.hahaa

i've lost my looks.aku sungguh tidak terurus.dgn misai dan janggut tumbuh meliar.rambut pun dah mcm singa sehingga aku terpaksa pakai -.-

i need somebody to tell me things such as wey pegi shave,wey pegi sikat rambut and etc2.anybody?

well then.till next time.
a very small update.

well 1st preview of Jyuupon Gatana/ shirt.

front for all
back for dota 1
back for dota 2
counter-strike/cod 1
counter-strike 2

how was it? just 30% from overall progress.
belum letak what kind of games,nick name and ranks.

pre-order now.text me.

let it be - the beatles

"and when the broken hearted people living in the world of agree,there will be an answer,let it be.for through they may be parted there is still a chance that they will see.there will be an answer.let it be."

been looping this song for almost 5 hours.em i dunno why i feel calm when i listen to this song..well maybe its just the right medication i need.. happens anyway..

allah itu maha kuasa.

allah itu maha adil.
allah itu maha mengerti.

aku telah di datangi musibahnya.
mulanya aku anggap itu bala.
aku juga menjadi gila.
juga alpa

bila aku kembali semula ke jalannya.
aku sedar.
ia penuh hikmah di sebaliknya.

ya allah.aku amat sakit,amat tersiksa sekarang.
tapi aku akur.aku redha..
aku cuma mengharapkan..setitis..kekuatan..
kurniakan aku kekuatan menempuh hari-hari yg akan datang.
amin.amin.ya rabbal al-amin..

p/s : selama 21 tahun dan 8 bulan aku hidup di muka bumi ni,kali ni adalah dugaan yg paling perit aku alami..oh sakitnya...oh bisanya...oh deritanya...

tears into wine

the gun is loaded when the glass is full.

down the hatch and the trigger is pulled.
off the wagon and back onto the stool.

i know that when i stare into your eyes.
i can see all the years of lies.
ghost and demons you never exorcised.

all the friends i ever known,
are the streetlamps i follow home.
and im in the crowd but im alone

oh lord i just cant :
tear the moon from the stars tonite.
twist my arm like a knife tonite
and if you wanna leave thats all right

well i'll just turn these tears into wine

p/s : here's to alcohol : the cause aof and answer to all life's problems

aku sedaya upaya tanak kaitkan dgn bangsa dan agama tapi apa yg alquran cakap tu betul

mari kita lihat balik zaman 2003,pandemic pada waktu tu SARS.kita lihat dari mana SARS ni datang.Hong Kong,China,Taiwan.

1968-1969 : pandemic pada zaman ni Hong Kong flu.Awine flu.Datang dari Hong Kong,China dgn Taiwan gak. 2.5 billion population mati.

right.nowdays.2009.latest pandemic.H1N1 which orginated jugak from sana.

so what is the diffential equation kat sini.bahaha mentang2 amik d.e poyolak kan.
em i believe sbb all this sepet punya kaum eats pork.yes.dlm al-quran dah sebut dah pork ni taleh makan,taleh pegang,taleh buat pape pon.ada cacing / kuman yg takkan mati kalau di baka lama mana ke,masak bape lama ke.

asal la kerajaan malaysia ni taleh amik tindakkan yg mudah ni dengan mamposkan je semua babi2 kat kandang2.pastu mamposkan ke pemakan babi kat malaysia ni.mamposkan je source utama ni.biar takde lagi.sudah terang lagi bersuluh bahawa babi itu merbahaya.asal la masih tak sedar.timkaiii.tim mo lei kaiii.

kalau aku jadi PM,dulik ah.aku orgnya radikal.i'll do whatever just to survive.i'll definitely launch genocide to all pigs,pig eater and whatever associates with pigs.kill em all.puncaaaaa.

so.sorry.bukan niat aku nak racist.its the truth.pigs arent do us anygoods.bila la insan sepet dari asia ni nak sedar.learn lar dari history.please.mahai kat sini dah ada 1 kes mati.argh.

p/s : pigs are not allowed.

yeh sampai gak uia gombak.

boss tunjuk peace

aku dgn akak cacat lmao

haha amik gamba dgn pengantin gagap.sian gile -.-

acai dgn akak pengemis cacat weee

ashra,akak cacat,acai,shah dgn marwan (import from syira seh)

acai dgn pengantin cacat

so ceritanya mcm ni,aku sampai lambat.around 9.20 ++ n cerita dah start.semalam punya tak aku rasa kinda rugi.sbb best kot.mmg best.bole challenge uitm punya budak PA.eventho uniten punya standard masih belum mencapai tahap dedua2 uni ni,takpa,abg qayyum ada.aku dgn acai bertanggung jawab memajukan arena theater ni dekat uniten.

play ke 2 sangaaaat nice.bout the faboulous 5.lama tak tgk musical theater.gabungan oldies dgn charlie chaplin like sangat damn and darn creative.two thumbs up for the crew,actors and director,producer pun.i'll manage to go there luna yay :D
nanti lepas raya hopefully mine play di approve registrar.if its approved,please come and visit me pulak :D

gutten nicht.4 am sudah.oh lupa.kartini,happy 22nd birthday.god bless you.i owe u another sushi king dine-out.


p/s : migrain.dunno whats keeping me to stay up to this late sedangkan everysecond,everymove,everybreath,every eyeblink is very it endurance?

i saw what i saw.

1.29 am.

i saw a meteor shower,out side my window,in the slow rainy night.
its beautiful.sangat beautiful.really...
besarnye kejadian ilahi..

tapi mlm ni aku agak sedih.
tak dapat pegi tgk theater kat tempat miss luna.sbb takde transport.
then facebook.whats the problem tah.cant write anything to anybody.
agak pissed off.

sorry luna.tmr i try my best to go there.i'll try okay.


im finding my way back to sanity again.
though i dont really know what im gonna do when i get there.
take a breath and hold on tight.
spin around one more time.
and gracefully fall back in the arms of god.

cause im hanging on every word u say.
and even if you dont wanna speak tonite,thats alright,alright with me.
cause i want nothing more then to sit outside heaven's door
and listen to your breathing.
its where i wanna be.
where i wanna be.

im looking past the shadows,
of my mind into the truth and im trying to identify,
the voices in my head.
which one is you.let me feel one more time.
what if it feels like to feel.
and break this calluses of me.
one more time.

oh i dont want a thing from you.
bet you're tired of me waiting for the straps to fall off of your table to the ground.
la da da da da...

lets see if i can complete these in a week.


i miss a lot.

lanc inc.a group of extraordinary Defense of The Ancients (DOTA) players which i manage to assemble from last year.with my leadership,lanc inc has reach to a very high level of gameplay,style,teamwork,combo,understanding with coordinated absolute defense and offense in the lanes we control.the games we play usually consists of 5 versus 5.and the outcome? 5 come 5 die.not 5 of us.its 5 of our rivals.

lanc inc had a good team position consist of 2 main gankers (runner) which is myself,qayyumx and my lane partner Xn-Inqhisa.we both act as the mastermind of in executing team kills or hunting enemies in their territory.why we claimed to be the best gankers? we never let them go.we kill instantly,without they noticing it.with my experties in providing the team with several support-kill items,my combo with qhisa is quite imposible to be defeated.

next up is the 2 farmers.this position is usually filled in by my captain,StevenYong38(main farmer/carry),my squad leader,crackerzx(2nd farmer),elite member,ahmy-monkey(semi carry,semi farm) and feyyo red(semi gank).their job is only to farm the money,and own in the late game (minutes 30 and above).both gankers will cover the 2 farmers when they farming in the lane.with coordinated attacked command issued by me,their safety is assured.

and the last position is support role.this role is usually/automatically filled in by me,but then this role is played by bmdghost.this role will provide the team with healing items,wards and courier.he is also responsible for telling the team which lanes holds the power up such as haste,double damage,illusion and invisible.those who manage to control this power up will had the upperhand in the game.

our combination is quite impossible to be countered,or defeated.because we're the best among the best.whats differ us from the others clan is,we play for victory,and fun.and what differs us from other malays team? i'd say we play for the malays.eventho lanc inc got 2-3 chinese in it.but some of the malays like to pretend to be chinese and bully their own race.then get cocky with it.lanc inc arent like that.

lanc inc also had several new talents which currently in development such as qb-makang,ryoma010,U~G,feyyo white,botakku.

preparing for a team gank.feyyo as bait,steven as 2nd bait and i as the main job.

i go in,and use ravage,while others attacking and there comes qhisa,the big package delivering a mighty epicenter right after i use ravage on them.

the result is very clear.5 come? 5 dead.

i am very proud with my boys.none of them can be replaced.sorry i couldnt play that much nowdays.gotta do guys keep it up.

p/s : got a bunch of replays against others.mail me if interested.

diu niama chao hai naim

"boss,kau hidup sepi dgn bertemankan roti bakar dan milo suam"

ayat naim ketika di YM semalam.
yeh.what to do.been curse with this curse of living alone.

i dont least aku belum ada imaginary friend.hahaaa.
or at least aku realize yg kawan2 ni datang dan pergi je.except for my jyuupon gatana.
selain jyuupon gatana,kawan2 yg lain ni datang dgn pergi kejap offence but thats the fact.

educating you all a proper english

perhaps the most interesting world in english word today is the word FUCK.out of all the word that begin with the letter F,FUCK is the only word referred to the F WORD,one magic word of all.

it is not only associated with the sex term,in fact,in one word,it can be used to describe PAIN,LOVE,HATE,PLEASURE and GRATITUDE.

FUCK is driven from the word FRICHEN (german) which means to strike,FUCK also falls into many grammatical categories for instance,

transitive - rafiq fucks rafiq jr
intransitive - rafiq fucks

as for adjective - fuck is used in these circumstances
:rafiq is doing all the fucking work alone.

as for adverb
:rafiq is talking too fucking much.

as for adverb enhancing adjectives
:rafiq is fucking gay

as a noun
:rafiq dont give a fuck

as a part of a word
:rafiq is doing his job in-fucking-credibilly

FUCK can also be used as daily word of expression in several circumstances in our daily life.
for example,

if we get fraud - i got fucked up by this fucking taxi
if were in trouble - i guess im fucked up now
if were having difficulty - i dont understand this fucking question
if were having disatisfaction - i dont like what the fuck is going on here
dismissing people - why dont you go outside and fuck yourself.
to dismay - ohh fuck it
as inquiry - what the fuck is that?
incompetence - he's a fuck face
as agression - dont fuck with me buddy.

i can anyone be offended with the usage of FUCK in our daily lives.

say it loudly and proudly


hello mr punchbeg.

July 2009.

july 26,
-went to up new friends : dumbells,skipping ropes,back trainer,bike

july 28,
-met a new friend named : mr punchbeg.he gave me permission to punch his face.

july 29-31
-he getting closer and closer to me

August 2009

august 1-august 3
-back in home town

august 4
-i share my biggest secrets/regrets with him,and he let me punch his fucking face so hard as the payment for listening of my blah blah blehs

august 5
-we became best friends.

i think he could be my bestfriend for now (non-living thing),and he understand me the most,unlike you guys do.he seems to understand for what im going through and helping me out from the hell hole that i've been living till now.

yours sincerely,

p/s : i love u mr punchbeg.

search - cakap mmg murah

cakap mmg murah.begitula harga statement/ayat/pernyataan/kenyataan/lisan/perbuatan

begitu murahnya harga kata2 apabila dgn sewenang-wenangnya ia di perkatakan.biasalah.
waktu org suka semuanya indah.waktu dah tak suka ada-ada je.

takde kawan la,konon2 akulah the one and only kawan la.
then bile dah takde.oh tiba2 ramai pula kawan.jantan lak tu.bahahaha


cakap mmg murah.
RM 20? RM 50?
pick ur price :D

cakap mmg murah : PAWNAGE! OWNAGE! TOTAL EPIC!

btw yes its personal.haha! <---- dendam