Horizon Zero Dawn, and im somewhat of down too??

i bought a new game. ok i pre-ordered. again. and it was freaking 3 days late from the release and from what it advertised. kinda pissed because everyone started playing n all i can do is just wait. its been crazy 3 week back to back work. havent had any break in between. cuti pun mcm tak cuti. i cant sleep. having some trouble with the tolerance-break ending period. having black and white vivid dreams. nightmares.

and i kinda feel the peer-pressure of someone's near me whos getting married soon. i mean, his marriage? he did nothing, and all the babbling goes to me and my head feels like its gonna pop anytime soon. idk how did i survive, but i did.

and at nights, suddenly the fear of being left out alone came. eating me whole. its like 14' again. wondering if do any wrong. hanging. just like that, you're gone. the picture's there, like endless loops. prisoner of time. in mind.

tolerance break period is hellish, everytime. but things will get better, eventually. the sleep. the emotions. the bursting and low period of eating cycle. just drink more plain water, sweat the hell out, rest properly.

thats pretty much explains.